Monday started with such great potential. I had an early morning appointment at the dentist. I know, that doesn’t sound like a great start to the day. When you are a mom of five, however, being childless in a room with soft music playing over the speakers is heavenly – even if someone is scraping the fire out of your teeth and scolding you for not flossing more often. {Flossing? Are you kidding me? Who has time for that?}

Then, I picked up all of my little people and took them to a pizza buffet where you can eat cheese and bread until your heart is content for only $2.99. My children always head straight for the dessert pizza and I let them. I decided a long time ago that it was ridiculous to tell them, “No, sweet child. I care too much about your health to let you eat chocolate pizza until you have first eaten a piece covered in cheese and pepperoni.” So, I walk my five year old up to the dessert section, catch the eye of the guy behind the counter and give him the look that says, “Yeah, we’re going to be needing some more of this chocolaty stuff. Oh, and you might as well throw one of those apple ones in the oven too because that’s what mama likes.” For the life of me, I can’t figure out why the last of this baby weight won’t come off.

Then, because none of my kids are napping these days and I like to live on the wild side, I made a trip to the public library. My kids each check out three books and I am already mentally tallying up late fees. I’m pretty certain I heard the workers let out a sigh of relief as I marched all of my children back out into the cold. If anyone knows how to help a 2 year old understand “inside voice”, please clue me in because I am 0 for 4 so far and I only have one more chance.

So, it’s home we go where we now have an extremely tired 2 year old who no longer naps {don’t even get me started on that one} and two children who still need to do school work.

I feel like I’m not doing it justice here but, let me just tell you, the day went downhill quickly. I finally sent everyone downstairs and let them know that, for their own safety, they needed to go into the bedroom, close the door and not come out no matter what they heard. I felt like a horrible mother for needing to escape from the very ones I birthed.

I also have quite a bit of anxiety about possibly teaching a Bible study in the Spring. You know those cartoons where there is an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other? Well, I feel like I have a devil on each shoulder. One tells me that, sure, people are asking me to lead one but do I have the time or the ability to lead one well? The other tells me that, sure, I love Scripture and nothing excites me more than teaching it but what if no one comes?

As I’m typing this, I just heard footsteps coming up the stairs. I may or may not have informed the nameless child that she really, like really, wanted to turn around and go back from whence she came or she would see mama’s head spin and it would not be nearly as cool as it sounded.

So, lest you think I have it all together, that is my tale of the day mama had a meltdown.