I have been struggling…and, to be honest, have not wanted to post. I mean…seriously…how do you tell the world that you are downright “giddy for God” one day and then admit that you are confused and feeling all alone the next?
Several months ago, when I began this blog, I began one of the posts with these words…
There is something I want. Something I have wanted for several years now, but I don’t yet have it…
Well, here’s the thing. I still don’t have that thing. So, every time I feel like I am totally in tune with God and I’m getting a sense of what He wants me to do…Satan whispers in my ear. So, about that prayer, has He answered that yet? No? Hmmm…just checking. I can just hear his evil chuckle as he senses my heart getting heavy again. Don’t get me wrong…it’s not that I get angry with God or refuse to seek His will. I just get distracted. I continue to read through the Bible, but find that I have made it through two books without one passage jumping out to me.
So…I have been praying and the one word that is repeating in my mind is focus. It’s not that my heart has changed…I am madly in love with God. It’s not that my God has moved…He is as close as He has ever been. It’s just that my focus has shifted. It’s as if, for these last three months, I have been following closely behind God. I’ve been staring straight ahead and seeing only Him. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw something move ever so slightly and I turned my head. For just a moment, mind you. Then, once I turned my head, something else caught my attention. Before I knew it, I was off track and struggling to return.
I may have mentioned that I am feeling led to teach. I feel like that is why I am on this in-depth journey through the Bible. Because, after all, how can you teach what you don’t know? And, I firmly believe, that Satan is trying to make this just a task to be completed. He wants me to hurry through and check it off my list, but not have any new insights for myself and definitely not anything that I could share with others. I have even started thinking that maybe I have misunderstood God about the whole teaching thing…but then…this past Sunday, my pastor was preaching in Matthew and on the page opposite of what he was reading were these words…
Whatever I tell you in the dark, speak in the light; and what you hear in the ear, preach on the housetops. –Matthew 10:27
It’s as if God was confirming to me that I should teach. Though I do not recall ever reading this verse, it was already underlined in my Bible. Clearly, at some point in the past, this verse spoke to me. I really feel that God was trying to reassure me. I’m not giving you these insights just for you, Stacy. Someone else can benefit from what you are learning.
So, I’m beginning today with a renewed focus.
We all are familiar with the Lord’s prayer (Matthew 6:5-15). I would have never thought of focus in connection with this verse, but I love how The Message paraphrases this passage…specifically verse 6…
Here’s what I want you to do: Find a quiet, secluded place…Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace.
You see…that is what I have needed the last couple of days…a shift of focus from me to God…and a renewed sense of His grace.
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5 thoughts on “Let’s Focus Now…”
You have no idea how OFTEN the words that you write have an impact on me.
“So, about that prayer, has He answered that yet? No? Hmmm…just checking. I can just hear his evil chuckle as he senses my heart getting heavy again. Don’t get me wrong…it’s not that I get angry with God or refuse to seek His will. I just get distracted.”
wow. I am heavy hearted right now- and I need to re-focus.
thank you for another wonderful post Stacy!
Satan: “So, about that prayer, has He answered that yet? No? Hmmm…just checking.”
Stacy: “He might not have answered THAT prayer YET, but – now help me out here, Satan – I can’t quite remember – what is it you are going to be doing while I am hanging out with Jesus in heaven? Oh, yeah. NOW I remember. Take that, Satan! Nah-nah-nee-boo-boo. You can’t get me! THHHPPPPPPTTTTTT!”
Do not feel alone with what you are feeling. I believe we all go through this same thing. Just keep reading God’s word and absorbing it. I’ll keep you in my prayers. Thank you for being so honest about this. It was a big help to me today!!
Even though I’ve just recently become aware of your blog and want to have more time to read some of your older posts (will when i’m feeling better from surg.) what you are learning is already TEACHING me from what I have read. As I read this new post it really hit home for me. I feel like Satan has been whispering in my ear lately and not only that, he’s laughing all the way, b/c he seems to be successful in detracting me from the plans I know God has for me. Yes, I needed surgery, but the fact that I have been sick a few months and they finally figured it out and I needed surgery during the 2nd week of bible study and another class at church seems to have Satan written all over it. I know he uses his sneaky tactics whichever way he can. If he can detract me from church and God and growing in my faith, I’m sure he’s happy and smiling. I can’t wait to be feeling better and read some more of your blog. It is teaching me and it is very inspiring to me. Thank you so much for sharing your faith on this blog. I’m so glad you left a comment on my blog so I could “find” yours! God is using you in an awesome way and thats awesome! Thanks again for your most recent comment on my blog. I’ve been having a BAD day, I’m sure satan is rejoicing in that all the way and your comment was like a ray of sunshine and so helpful. Praise the Lord. Thanks.
(P.S. sorry for the loooong comment. I’m not always concise ! 🙂 By the way, I love your name and it’s spelling. LOL. Good name! 🙂
Wow, this post is so good and speaks to everyone as we all go through this. Sometimes I feel like I re-focus…and then five minutes later I have to re-focus again…and all day… I’m so glad God is so consistent and patient with me.